o week part deux: day 1
start a rumor monday

winfrey: 'don't get it twisted, whitey. i will play sofia and you will be the mayor's wife, ya heard?'

don't get duped...again. much has been said about the latest events surrounding the a million little pieces debacle that blew up in oprah's face as if she stepped in a landmine during a tour of 'nam in '67. having been outted as a studio gangsta (shoutout mrs. robinson!) by the smoking gun, author james frey--who spent the latter part of 2005 reaping rewards and depositing mad scrilla in his piggy bank due to the "oprah's book club" stamp of approval--had to face the music. unfortunately for him, the musician was an angry black woman with a lot of viewers. survey says that shit was worse than getting your ass beat in front of your class in fourth grade when your teacher called your mama because you were acting out. and unfortunately for you, your mama was on vacation from her job and was washing her hair when she got the call. so she came up to the skool in too tight sweatpants, some dirty as, nigga. oprah's mad, no doubt. but let us tell you the real:

a million little pieces is the only oprah's book club pick she ever really read.

(ain't it a bitch when sparknotes ain't available and shit?)

yuh. the edited version of the episode showed winfrey george foreman grillin' lil jimmy (that nigga looked shook on the real) on every embellishment lie he told in his, er, memoir. but on the live show, winfrey said, "but i read the whole book, but i read the whole book" sporadically throughout the show.

"she was devastated," one of winfrey's producers--who wanted to remain anonymous--said in a brief interview. "she couldn't believe the book club choice she finally read in its entirety was full of lies. all she kept saying in our morning meeting before the show was, 'who makes up stories, compiles them, and puts them in a book? who does that? who does that?'"

winfrey has retreated to her santa barbara, ca home called promised land for rest and clarity.

in unrelated news, james frey is really an alcoholic now. fortunately, he can afford the good stuff this time around.