Tuesday, March 15, 2005

personality chix of the world...unite!!!!


safire...........................nahmix................fecundmellow

ok. so, for those of you who don't know, saf, nahmix, and i all kick it together in real life. we hang out often. we drink, we pass out on each other's beds, fall asleep on each other's toilets, piss in each other's showers (only when drunk and the toilet is occupied, of course). we go to bad plays and heckle the actors (nigga whippa!), we got inside jokes. we talk maaaad shit. and though we haven't known each other for years and years, if you hung out with us, you'd swear we grew up together.

anyway, we're now officially a crew. we call ourselves personality chix. don't get it twisted. this does not simply consist of blogging and drinking a lot. we actually have a plan. we're gonna be the first renaissance women of our generation. we're gonna produce funny, thought-provoking work. this is just a warning...

what is a personality chick?
a personality chick is that one girl who has to put in a lil work to get some action. it's not that she's ugly, it's that she just can't necessarily walk into a room and have hella niggas (or girls in my case) tripping over her weave to get the digits. we gotta be funny, smart, know about hip hop and nigga shit, you know, have great personalities. this, as a result, has made us some cool bitches.

who are personality chix?
personality chix are saf, nahmix, and fecundmellow.

saf: this is one shameless bitch. there is nothing that you can say about her that makes her blush. she says all the things you wish you had the balls to say. and she always uses the right words--eloquent like a mofo; helluva writer. rocks a relaxer and makes that shit revolutionary. does not apologize for who she is, and will not change for anyone. (we've tried to get other women to kick it with us, but saf always scares them away.)

nahmix: you want this chick to be your manager. iono, but she be having her shit together. she actually saves money!! she got fly ass natty dreads, and a shoe collection most bitches would envy. and she's so fuckin' coooool. if anybody knows and is confident in who they are, it's nahmix. unlike the other two, she's actually very nice and sweet. she keeps us in check. well, sometimes. she'll make sure both saf and fecundmellow make something out of themselves, and don't spend up their money on booze and weed. she will create a legacy before it's all said and done. she's focused, man.

fecundmellow: what a self-degrading bitch. fecundmellow is a daydream believer. she's almost as irreverent as saf, but doesn't have the mean streak. she is a professional shit-talker. hates to be cornered. despises being figured out. prefers the internet over personal communication. wants to quit skool and become a frequent contributer to vh1's best week ever and i loves the __s series. because she lacks focus, she needs nahmix very much. and because she can punk out at times, she needs saf. oh, and she digs pretty girls. mostly from afar, though.

**I'M NOT SURE IF I GOT THE DESCRIPTIONS RIGHT, SO BE SURE TO LOOK OUT FOR AN EDITED POST.

what are the characteristics of a personality chick?
well, one of saf's recent posts, really sums up our current state of mind as black grad students. it's damn near like a manifesto...kinda. if you didn't read it on her blog, i've posted it below:

Inside Edition

University_logo Last night, I was chilling with the boyfriend (in town for the weekend), smokin' something, watching UConn play Syracuse, and he asked me where I got my weed. I told him: I got it from a friend who got it from this weed guy that she hooked up with over the Internet. To which he responded, "That's how you know you're a grad student." I couldn't even get mad. That shit was dead-on.

Just in case it's slipped past you, I am a Ph.D. student at the above hallowed institution. I study English, which is where the sense of entitlement that you felt coming off that "Eyes Were Watching God" post comes from. I am currently getting ready for my oral fields exam. And yes, I have obviously decided, like Bone Crusher, not to be scared if somebody puts two-and-two together and figures out who I am. Fuck it, whatever.

Anyway, there are some behaviors that my peers and I have that distinguish us as graduate students, and even more, as black grad students, that I'm sure regular nigs would find pretty funny if they peeped them. So here it is, a peek into our crazy world. Hope you love it.

Only a black grad student would...

Meet her weed man over the Internet.

Troll Craig's List instead of a bar to find a date.

Talk about the racial politics of "America's Top Model" instead of just laughing at how dumb the hoes are.

Have more bottles of hard liquor in her fridge than actual food.

Shelve her books 1) alphabetically; 2) thematically; 3) chronologically, or 4) according to the Dewey decimal system like a library (and I do know a chick that had her books arranged like this, no lie).

Hang pictures of literary icons and jazz legends, instead of Jesus and Martin Luther-the-King, next to the requisite photos of mama 'nem.

Do more emailing and instant messaging than actual talking to people.

Make up rap names for the professors in her department (Shout out, K-Whizzle and D Nelly!)

Buy 94% fat free popcorn because it's "healthier" and not less fattening.

Eat vegetarian or even vegan, but drink like a fuckin' fish and smoke hella weed.

Smoke weed, but not know how to roll a joint or blunt.

Have a martini shaker, bottle of Triple Sec, and speed pourers at the house.

Have more than one copy of the same book, but still be totally reluctant to loan the book out.

Use a debit card to buy a $5 coffee at Starbucks.

Buy a $5 coffee.

Stand in the audience of a hip hop concert, deconstructing the racial politics of the crowd.

Go to dinner with a stuffy scholar whose work is incomprehensible to her just to get free food and wine.

Have checks sent to her from her parents through UPS.

Watch the film adaptation of a classic novel with the novel out and open.

Call famous authors by their first names, like she knows those niggas personally.

Feel guilty for never having read "Moby Dick."

Consider blogging an "intellectual exercise."

ADDENDUM: Figure out how to have a helluva Saturday night for less than twenty dollars total.

Blog as much as I do when I have eighty damn books to read for my oral exams.

I'm such a nig, I know...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

so be on the look out for us. we're sure to blow up. soon as we quit drinking.



language alone protects us from the scariness of things with no names. language alone is meditation. ~toni morrison

9 Comments:

Blogger Jdid said...

quit drinking soon then. the world needs yall

15/3/05 21:13  
Blogger nahmix said...

thanks...sum41!!! that was really sweet! i'm glad i checked before you made changes. you do however need to work on your bio. you conveeniently left shit out like...how cool, funny and fun to be around you are. get off that negative shit....your that hot chick!!!

16/3/05 00:07  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm feelin personality chick. It beats the hell out of being referred to as the "funny tomboy" among my friends. Blah blah...your blog is the truth



Erin

16/3/05 01:09  
Blogger MB said...

personality chicks are genius . ..

so exciting to see what I have to look forward to in grad school. . .

16/3/05 10:36  
Blogger summer m. said...

@jdid--much easier said than done
@nahmix--no prob. i do need to work on being more positive.
@erin--thanx for taking a look at my blog. word up.
@moya--it's all downhill after undergrad!!!!

16/3/05 13:54  
Blogger Safire said...

Mwah. That's me giving you smooches for the nice things you said about me. You know I'm a whore for compliments.

16/3/05 15:58  
Blogger gbe said...

Are ya'll accepting applications to join the crew?

Can I be honorary when (if ever) I come visit (again)?

16/3/05 21:51  
Blogger summer m. said...

gbe,

you may submit your qualifications via email. we keep applications on file for 90 days.

there is, however, the saf test.

17/3/05 16:03  
Blogger Harold Gibson said...

Summer will you quit being so damn fascinating. I got sermons to prepare
and scriptures to exegete. And grad school is a blast.

3/6/05 20:13  

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