fecundmellow presents: a whole lotta yella wasted, or, in defense of my chix

(can you pass a brown paper bag test?)

my asshole-ishness is genetic. yes, yes y'all (and ya don't stop), i was born with it. no assholification process for me; i was born assholificating. but i digress. the purpose of that random and quite odd point of entry is to give a shout out to nannie (who is less than yella, and prolly coulda passed), my great-grandmother and lil summer's first best friend. she gotta lotta sayings, one of which is, '(such and such is) a whole lotta yella wasted'. this term--for those of you whose blackness is (often) in question and/or who are white--is used to described ugly light-skinned people. oh yes, being light-skinned and ugly is quite possible.

now every now and then some random ass chick harrasses my girls nahmix and safire b/c both claimed--and rightfully so--that tiny from xscape looks like piglet. it seems as if said random chick doesn't believe that light-skinned people can be ugly. therefore, to defend my gyrls, and further disprove the 'if you're white (in this case i suppose light is more appropriate) all right...' theory, below i provide more examples of ugly light-skinned people.


WARNING!: THIS BLOG ENTRY IS NOT SUITABLE FOR THOSE WHO ARE COLOR STRUCK


reggie miller: and the light eyes, too? what a waste. even his jumpshot is ugly. he'd also make the list of 'nigs who wouldn't get laid if they ain't have money' if i had one.


tisha campbell: good lord, she ain't cute. plus she gotta funny shape. once again proving that light-skinned chicks trying to be actors in the late 80s and 90s had a helluva better time than their darker counterparts. remember little shop of horrors? whatever happened to ronette, the big dark-skinned(ed) singer? that's right: it is her only film role. and tichina arnold? well, she did have the stint as pam on martin, but where is she now? what about a.j. johnson--you know, sharane from house party; sydney's (arnold) homegirl? well all i know is she was in wack-ass baby boy playing tyreese's mama. it's a good thing she's a fitness trainer.


will smith: yeah, nigga, i said it. will smith is ugly. don't get fooled by the good-grooming, wack rhymes, and alleged charm. (frankly, i find him boring and uninteresting.) will you look at those features? those ears. them little, too far apart eyes. and--might i add--that very negroid nose.


tom joyner: oh man. there is a reason why this cat is on the radio. the fact that he gets on my last nerve further exacerbates his ugliness.


jasmine guy: personally, i think jasmine guy and prince look alike. she wasn't too bad looking during her a different world days, but damn she DID NOT age well. she, too, benefited from the 'light skinned(ed) chicks are in movement' during the late 80s and early 90s. i mean, damn, as annoying as she was on adw, she still got way more play than kim who was super pre-med student and worked at the pitt (she can cook!) but only got like 1 episode of play during the early years ('member the one where she had the pregnancy scare?).**


ronnie devoe: how many girls had a crush on the yella tall nigga in new edition? if anybody benefited from being the lightest member of a boy band, it's ronnie devoe.


tiny: i believe saf and nahmix have sufficiently argued for her inclusion on this list.


tayshaun prince: i love the way he plays basketball, and i really looooove the fact that he's left-handed, but that's about it. even the baby face doesn't help.

as saf often says, 'some shit is empirical.'

oh, i could go on, but i'm sure someone will fill in the blanks.

i rest my case.


**i know towards the end of the show kim got love from ron johnson and shit, but damn, she had to wait a long ass time. and i know freddie ain't get no play either, but she was weird and from new mexico. (who the fuck is from new mexico?)

once again: fecundmellow essentializes regardless of race, color, creed, sex, sexual orientation, religious affiliation, et. al.