Monday, August 15, 2005

(start a rumor monday...)

jones, mcmillan join in anti-gay marriage campaign

the conservative crusade to preserve the sanctity of and protect marriage has troops to add to the fight. no, britney spears has not had her marrying privileges taken away permanently. talk show host, star jones and ghetto lit goddess, terry mcmillan have (re)discovered their christian values, and joined in the debate concerning gay marriage-- siding with the conservatives.

"it's not that i'm against gay marriage. i'm just against gays marrying other gays," star jones' publicist read from a statement by ms. jones during a press conference early monday morning. "if such ideas go into law, can you imagine how even more limited the pool of eligible single black men will be? i'm not doing this for me, because i am the happily married star jones reynolds. i'm doing this for my girls. black women need love, too. a love like al's and mine."

though jones pledged her allegiance to a gay marriage ban out of love, mcmillan's support more than likely comes from a place of anger. just months after news hit that her (soon to be former) husband, jonathan plummer 'discovered' he was gay, and therefore sought to officially terminate his husbandly duties, mcmillan has used her book tour as an opportunity to put her two cents in the battle. "just the thought of allowing gay people to marry other gay people makes me cringe. all this peace, love, and happiness surrounding the gay lifestyle makes me sick. it's the reason why my marriage ended. what happened to the good old days when gay men passed for straight? they should make you stay in gay areas and not mingle with the natives if you're gonna act all queer. like jim crow for gay people--call it jim j. bullock, " she laughed. "i fucking hate rainbows."

"what's a marriage if you don't lie to one another?" both seem to be asking. during the view's "hot topics" segment jones said, "tell me you were at your boy's watching the game, and that you fell asleep. don't tell me you went to the titty bar. and if you're gay, that's fine. just lie to me about it. how many married couples have sex? with each other anyway? i know al and i don't. but that doesn't mean we're not in love. we're absolutely in love. i, star jones reynolds, do solemnly swear that i'm in love with my husband, the love of my life, mr. al reynolds."

to which joy behar responded, "it's apparent that you do not support gay men marrying each other, but what about lesbians?"

"oh, i looove lesbians. it makes the statistics more even. besides, they really know how to change my oil. and for cheap, too."

(eh. i'm off. my bad.)

apparently, you can vote for the black weblog awards as often as you like. who knew?

language alone protects us from the scariness of things with no names. language alone is meditation. ~toni morrison


Blogger Miss Jessi said...

Oh my goodness... I can't take it... I'm laughing so hard my head hurts... good one!

15/8/05 14:45  
Anonymous ~eLLe~ said...

u know i have too many stalkers/haters on my blog DAILY, so i have to SOMEtimes keep mama's business

15/8/05 17:11  
Anonymous oops.. 4got 1 word said...


15/8/05 17:22  
Blogger Harold Gibson said...

Terry is a hoot. Y'all need to let up on Star Jones and Al. You gonna make them show up on the sizzle.

15/8/05 22:49  
Blogger a. said...

Last week or the week before, the View had these two "reformed" gay guys talking about a camp where people "unlearn" their gayness. I wonder who chose that segment...

15/8/05 23:30  
Blogger mwilli said...

ooh that last part is sooo true. most of the lesbians i know really do know how to change my oil ..ummm in exchange for something else, but that's private.

16/8/05 01:01  
Blogger mwilli said...

oh and i love you summer for playing meshell in your blog.

16/8/05 01:03  
Blogger T. Zac. R. R. said...

I thought it was really interesting that when they did the "hot Topics" on the View a few weeks ago about Terry McMillan and Jonathan Plummer that Star Jones was not there to comment. Then when she returns they have a reform gay program. The she probably wishes she can put Al in. In anycase Star is against gay marriage because she knows her ass wouldn't be married if Al could have married the man of his dreams.

16/8/05 03:24  
Anonymous ~eLLe~ said...

omg WHY is star in SUCH denial??? 'i'm just against gays marrying other gays" ?wtf? who do u suggest we marry then mrs. reynolds? insecure talk show hosts that are also delusional?

p.s. my favorite is 'dread locs' by meshell... :dreamy sigh::

16/8/05 09:22  
Blogger summer m. said...

@elle: star didn't really say that. i just made that up.

16/8/05 14:30  
Blogger Phoenix said...

this is a hot shitty mess. let's just get logical for a quick minute--why would you want someone who's just pretending to want your ass? what on earth does that have to do with the pool of eligible black men? if they're gay, they're gay, they don't want your girls anyway!!

these people be gettin' on my last damn nerve...

17/8/05 03:30  
Anonymous eLLe said...

oh- but STILL i know she's THINKING it!!!!

17/8/05 08:32  
Blogger Kilimanjaro: High and Lo said...

LOL! I'm in tears....

oh how i love when you start rumors, especially when Star Jones is the feature. funny stuff!!

and that fiery terri mcmillan don't play. i saw her tavis' show and she looked like she wanted to woop sum ass.

20/8/05 11:09  

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