start a rumor monday...










jesus: the interview

last week, fecundmellow was able to catch up with the ever elusive santa claus and get a pretty nice interview. now, just less than a week before the celebration of his birthday, we were able to hang out with the homeboy, hey-seuss. he is the reason for the season, you know.

fecundmellow: mr. christ, before we begin, i'd just like to say happy birthday.
jc: daddy bless thee. feel free to call me baby jeezy.

fecundmellow: baby jeezy?
jc: christ the savior is born.

fecundmellow: he is risen, nigga.
jc: wordeth.

fecundmellow: tell me about this new name, baby jeezy.
jc: a new incarnation, if you will. sort of like diddy, dig? i'll reveal my new name officially when my album drops.

fecundmellow: tell us about that.
jc: it's a 5 mic-er, i doubteth not. it's called ready to die.

fecundmellow: an homage to biggie?
jc: no, an homage to me.

fecundmellow: but already? i mean, your debut was released just this last spring. is the public ready for a follow-up so soon?
jc: one must always be ready for my second coming. the material on this album was too hot to sit on. besides, it's the holiday season, and much of what i'm spitting is inspired by that.

fecundmellow: how so?
jc: most of the tracks are sampled from holiday songs and what not. plus, dem wisemen did most of the production. their production is more blessed than the meek. 'specially the frankincense and myrrh remix of 'what child is this?' shit is bananas (comma) yo. but we really needed to push the album release date up due to leaks on the internet and whatnot.

fecundmellow: is that mary magdalene singing the hook on 'o holy night'?

[temporary intern spills coffee on her lap] jesus!

jc: yes?

intern: oh, my bad.

fecundmellow: [sighs] last week i talked to santa claus. and off the record, he told me he had a lot of love and respect for you. despite that, the publik paints a picture of the two of you beefing. do you have any response to that?
jc: claus is my nigga. we different, but we got similar struggles, dig? folks forget about us for most of the year; folks believe in us, but have never seen us; and, most people think we're white. so that whole beef thing, you know, it's bogus. the publik, the media created it. i mostly got beef with these rappers, you know--and not because of the jesus pieces. nigs be trying to cop my shit like i ain't looking. take eminem. my crew is the original d-12, and that nigga act like he ain't know. feel me?

fecundmellow: i feel you. any chance you drop a freestyle for us before we end this interview, baby jeezy?
jc: word up.

yuh yo/yo/yo...
when drummer boy drops the beat/it's game over/
recognize real, nigga/i'm the true j-hova
moreover/me and the saints march like straight soldiers/
believe in me/live eternally/playa i told ya/
us manger niggas we bolder/
ice we rock be colder/
weight of the world we shoulder/
we play hands and never fold (unh)/
streets is paved with gold (unh)/
i and i will save your soul (unh)/
greatest story ever told (unh)/
b-jeez, nigga...

fecundmellow: word up. that shit was dylan, son!**
jc: father and holy spirit. [gives summer m. a pound.]




*dylan: hot like fiyah. (yeah, like making the band 2 and chappelle's show. if you need more help than that, ask nick.)